Andy is blogging today. Ann is over in OurLittleCorner with the “purrfect” subject – and a recipe which may be a little “fishy.”
It should have been a red flag when they told us at the animal shelter that the kitten we were considering for adoption had been nicknamed “Feisty.” But how can anyone resist such a cute, blue-eyed (albeit crossed-eyed) little Lynx Point Siamese kitten? So Feisty came home with us and we renamed her Ono Moore – as in, “Oh no more cats” (which, by the way, wasn’t as prophetic as I had wished).
Ann and I aren’t rookies when it comes to pets. We’ve had cats and dogs throughout our entire married life. When Ono crossed our threshold she joined Trace, our aging Blue Point Siamese, along with Oakley, our Aussie. Trace and Oakley welcomed Ono with open arms (or legs if you want to be technical about it). Our household was filled with warmth and love. We never would have dreamed that Ono would turn out to be such a jerk.
Ono’s drift to being a jerk started after Trace went to that great scratching post in the sky and we filled our cat void with another Siamese adoptee, ChocoLatte. Ono was not pleased to have this new kid on her block. And she was quick to show her displeasure. In fact, their relationship became so cantankerous that I documented their antics for an earlier post (A Tale of Two Kitties). Unfortunately, a span of nearly eight years of togetherness has not put a dent on Ono’s distain for Choco.
But Ono’s nastiness to Choco doesn’t qualify her for jerk status, at least according to Colleen Grablick in a recent article in The Washington Post – “Cats aren’t jerks. They’re just misunderstood.” She points out that clashes between cats can be fueled by differences in age, energy level and lived experience. And in some cases their “personalities simply don’t gel.” I’ll concede the point that rather than being a jerk to Choco, Ono may be acting in a predictably cat-like manner (even though I would bet a bunch that if asked, Choco would say that Ono is a jerk).
It’s how Ono interacts with humans (and dogs) that puts her in the jerk category, at least to my way of thinking. Let me give some examples and see if you agree.
I’ll start with Ono’s adverse effect on our dogs. They have learned through the school of hard knocks (slashes?) to give Ono wide berth. I can call 50-pound Oakley to come to dinner and if 8-pound Ono is between Oakley and her dish she will not come until I stand between the cat and Oakley’s intended path. And what absolutely petrifies either dog is when Ono will try to rub against one of them (while she’s purring). I truly believe that she does this out of spite and gets sadistic pleasure from their cringing responses.
Then there’s our typical bedtime routine with Ono. If you choose to sleep on your side she likes to snuggle against your bottom (aka butt) and if you sleep on your back she nests in the vicinity of your crotch . And to make matters worse she purrs quite audibly while settling in for the night. The problem is that each time you adjust your position she reciprocates with ominous growling that lasts until you’re again still – at which time she resumes her annoying purring. The last thing you want to do is to expose your hand from under the covers; her lightning fast claws have drawn blood on more than one such occasion.
Or consider the issue of house guests. Interestingly, Ono is quite gregarious compared to other cats we’ve lived with, including our lovable Choco. Ono is obsessed with visitors and not hesitant to get up close and personal, often purring and rubbing against their legs. We warn all guest to be wary of the cat and avoid petting her. Our son Travis suggests that we adhere to the “three strokes and you’re out” rule. But unfortunately, visitors often find it difficult to resist caressing a beautiful, purring cat. I can’t tell you how many well-meaning but naive people have succumbed to that urge only to painfully discover that our warnings had merit.
I had always wondered how and why cats purr. I found this in “How cats purr” – published by the Zoology Society of London: “the primary mechanism for sound and vibration production (aka, purring) is a centrally driven laryngeal modulation of respiratory flow.” I’ll have to take their word for it.
Why cats purr is not so straightforward. Matt Hambly on NewScientist.com claims that in addition to feeling pleasure, purring could be an indication of hunger or a cat feeling anxious (and there is some evidence that purring also may relieve pain in cats). The issue, according to Colleen Grablick in herThe Washington Post article is that we humans are not good at reading cats’ true feelings, and purring is a prime example. She argues that we tend to interpret purring as positive because of our desire to have happy cats. That’s why one shouldn’t think of a purring cat that bites you as a jerk – it’s just misunderstood and technically our fault, not the cat’s.
I must admit that after considering the case made by Grablick in her “Cats aren’t jerks…” article, I began rethinking my assertion that Ono is a jerk. Is it possible that Ono’s purring and preening are signs of her despair? Is her lashing out a cry for help? Am I guilty of blaming the victim – something every good sociologist should avoid?
While I was still mulling over these questions I had a run in with Ono that tipped the scale in favor of the”jerk” designation. It occurred while I was getting ready to retire for the night. As I came out of the bathroom barefooted and headed for the bed I noticed Ono quietly lying on the rug between the bed and me. I tried to gingerly step around her but must have come within striking range of her lightening fast claws and she nailed my foot. It hurt. And she wasn’t even purring. What a jerk!
We cat people abide and love our jerks.
Thanks for the comment. Good that you remind us that we do love the little jerks.
My lesbian girlfriend had a deeply troubled calico cat. My grandmother offered to keep it for us so we could visit Alaska.
I called my grandmother a few weeks later to see how the cat was doing. She asked if the cat had been vaccinated for rabies. Uhh, no. She had been stalking my grandfather, attacking him from ambush. The poor guy was afraid to come out of his room. She had also bitten my grandmother a few times.
My grandmother thought the cat was not yet comfortable staying with them.
The weird part was when we got back, my lesbian girlfriend talked my grandmother into keeping the cat.
Did your grandmother like the cat or did she keep it to harass your grandfather – or both?
It’s hard to say.
Mustn’t move your feet while in bed! Even while sleeping. Sweet, adorable Tipper will jump under the covers (from the side of the bed) and attack them. Is she a jerk? Still evaluating. (But we do love her.)
At the back of the weekly magazine The New Scientist there is always a cartoon pertinent to something. It’s called a ‘Twisteddoodles’. BINGO. This latest edition illustrates the difference between a G-Force and a C-Force with a stick finger person flat on his/her back with a red and black arrow pushing downward identified as +G. The explanation is: “G-force: a measure of acceleration that can inhibit the movement of a person under its influence’.
Drop your eyes then to the C-Force illustration below. Same person outlined but with the head slightly raised this time and (I detect) a hint of a rather uncertain look. The C-Force explanation: “You cannot move because there is a cat on you.” You can I presume guess what is on top of that figure’s body.
Oh, and by the way, since you have had to conclude that your cat is indeed a jerk, I remind you two of our beautiful moggie DEM (who lived to 19). She was so good at snuggling in between the covers to comfort me (and sometimes Jeannette) following my near death and hospitalisation 27 years ago that I reckon she, along with the fabulous gastro-intestinal surgeon who saved my physical life, was my other ‘medico’ in my semi-recovery along with Jeannette. And despite my having to get up very frequently she never once objected, just settled back in between my legs for our mutual comfort. No wonder my eulogy to a cat – her – runs to fully six pages of prose. I believe you have it in your files.
Thanks for the comment about DEM, your “moggie” – which is a term I had to look up. For those like me who don’t know, “moggie is a corruption of the word mongrel and is the feline equivalent of the word for a dog of uncertain parentage. It’s just an affectionate name for them.” Much better than “jerk” I must add. And clearly DEM was not in the jerk category.