A Cross-Generational Dinner Party: Life-Affirming or Pain in the Butt?

Ann, in today’s blog, extolls the virtues of cross-generational friendships.   She was partially inspired by a recent NY Times  article which suggests that such relationships can give us “a sense of connection that is life-affirming and energizing.”

While this all may sound well and good, I have some doubts about whether interacting with folks across the generational divide aways has such Pollyannaish outcomes. In fact, I would go so far as to suggest that such intergenerational schmoozing could be more of a pain in the butt than energizing or life-affirming. 

Considering the different tastes and expectations among these generations, I wonder what it would be like to throw a cross-generational dinner party. I can imagine all kinds of pain-in-the-butt issues.

For example, how would you select what kind of music to play in the background when the guests are arriving? This issue came home to me recently when I stopped by our favorite local bakery to pick up something for lunch. 

As I walked in the door I couldn’t help but notice the “music” they had playing on their sound system – I suppose with the intention of creating some sort of bakery-ish vibe. The only “vibe” I was getting was that it was grating and annoying. I asked the young Gen Z’er behind the counter what was playing on the sound system. With a tone of voice that suggested that she thought I must be from another planet, she replied that it was The Killers.  Not only had I never heard of that group, I’m rather happy I hadn’t. Although I may not be from another planet, this made it clear that I’m from another generation.

Maybe our dinner party can get by without music, but we certainly can’t get by without offering something to drink. Not surprisingly, there are many sites on the Internet about generational preferences for beverage consumption. One post I came across reports that Gen Z-ers are big tea guzzlers compared to Millennials, Gen X-ers, and Boomers. On the other hand, Millennials are more likely than other groups to prefer alcohol-based drinks. 

And when it comes to wine, which is a required dinner accompaniment here in Sonoma County, the data suggest that we can expect that our Boomer and Silent guests will be swilling it down, while the younger ones at the table will be politely sipping (and probably waiting for the opportunity to slip out to the deck for a toke or two, if you know what I mean). 

There are other potential complications.  For instance, I came across an article with the title, 10 Foods Boomers Love but Millennials Hate. It looks like we’ll have to avoid serving any of the following: creamed spinach, meatloaf, canned tuna, jello salad, prune juice, liver and onions, fruitcake, canned vegetables, cottage cheese, or gelatin molds. 

Then there’s the issue of food safety. A recent Pew Research Center survey found that younger generations are quite concerned about whether or not their vegetables and fruits are organic. On the other hand, we Boomers were found to be rather blasé about this issue. I guess we could put little “Eat at Your Own Risk” signs on dishes containing fruits or vegetables that are not organic. 

I’m sure by now that you get the picture of the pain-in-the-butt potential for hosting a cross-generational dinner party. But I have to admit that as I was putting on the finishing touches for this blog, I discovered a website for an organization called “Generations Over Dinner” that is devoted to just the thing I have been trying to discourage you from considering. After quickly skimming their website I’m almost convinced that the value of sitting down to a communal, multi-generational dinner might make the world a little better and may be worth a little bit of pain-in-the-butt inconvenience. 

Should you decide to put on such a dinner party and need a couple of Boomer guests, let us know.  We would be happy to share our generational wisdom with the youngsters and we promise not to be disappointed if you don’t serve liver and onions.